As I sit down to write this yearly reflection, I’m reminded of a quote that I love. It was written by one of my favorite authors, Ralph Waldo Emerson. I love his simple outlook on the world. He constantly encourages people to live a simpler, yet fuller life. The quote says, “Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it well and serenely…” This sums up my third year perfectly.
It’s hard to believe that three years ago I was in a state of pure panic. I was frustrated and scared. I, by this time, had interviewed for a couple schools, sent out what seemed like 50 other resumes, and hadn’t heard anything. I was battling the frustration and not doing a very good job at it. It was also around this time that Mrs. McKinney gave me the nudge to put myself out there. I did, and by the end of June, I would have my job at
I left the interview not thinking I had gotten the job. I didn’t think the principal that had interviewed me was impressed and even though he gave me a mini-tour of the building, I left thinking, “Well, at least it was good practice!” About a week later I was offered the job.
Three years, in some ways, has flown by. I hardly remember that interview, I hardly remember the summer of preparation. I remember the fear and anxiety, but specific moments fail me. Starting the job, however, was a different story. I remember everything. I remember the fear, the worry, and the panic. But, I also remember being done with my first year and being more proud of myself than I had been even graduating from college!
And here we are three years later. The reason I started this entry with the Emerson quote is because the past three years I’ve had some moments when I know I’ve taught kids well. But, I’ve also had moments where I knew I could’ve done better and I knew I could’ve done the lesson differently. Teachers can’t dwell on those moments. We finish the day. We have to be done with it. Though I’m finished with the year and I know there are tons of things I could’ve done different, some ‘blunders and absurdities’ most definitely ‘crept in’, but I’m finished with it and I have to move on. Next year is a new year and I will just try to work harder to fix mistakes I have made.
This year I taught all four English levels. I taught freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors. I saw sweet, little freshmen come in and I also saw my juniors mature into seniors. I taught the EOC. I graded what seemed like 3,344 research papers. I organized, technoligized (I know that’s not a word, but trust me, it should be), I learned new things, and I tried to take everything in.
Most importantly, I got to see my students grow. The students that are getting ready to become seniors were just coming in as freshmen when I was coming into my first year of teaching. I feel like we’ve grown together. We’ve finally made it to what seems to be a very established setting in our lives. I’m so proud of them, I already have mixed emotions about when they walk across that stage next year. I also, for what feels like the true first time, got to really mentor and advise a couple students. Develop a bond that I know Mrs. McKinney must have felt when I was in high school. I know that when these girls leave, I will still keep in touch and want to know what is going on. I am so sad, and yet so proud to see them move on.
I love my job on most days. I love my school on most days. But, I can’t lie and say I haven’t wanted to just up and leave. I have felt more frustration this year than I ever did my first or second year, I think that must be expected. But, again, like Emerson said…I taught, and I must move on. I will move on to my next year with new challenges and changes and welcome them anew.
Hello, summer…I’ve missed you.
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